BY Victoria Lasbrey
TWO THINGS THAT MADE ME NOT TO GIVE UP ON MARRYING AGAIN.
1: An ex told me I can never see someone like him. That statement made me feel less of myself at some point in my life after I walked away. The challenges were too much. That almost played a role in my life at a point because it was difficult for me to survive without him. So I thought I was actually a bad woman. Not knowing I was feeling that way because I can't afford to buy pant without asking him for the money.
An experience of when your Abuser decided to trap your soul from seeing any other man/woman better than them. They provide you with virtually every you need. So that when you leave, you will find it difficult to survive without them then run back to them.
When the hardship was too much, I cried to God and asked if truly I am that bad that I couldn't get a man to tolerate me.
The answer I got was, "Double your hustle so you don't go hungry to beg all the time"
By the time I doubled my hustle truly, I started seeing responsible helpers. Not knowing I was playing too hard to get as well. My past hurt blinded me from seeing the future. (Even though my husband was part of them, my shakara no gree me see am because I was too busy looking for Mr Handsome not knowing that truly, some people are not just photogenic. So God decided to delay my marriage till the day I met him one on one after 5yrs of toasting and yabbing him. 😄 Oh.. God! I insult this man o... at some point I kept asking myself why I couldn't block him the way I block those irritating me. He wouldn't come to my inbox when he wants to piss me off. He piss me off openly and make me be like a wild cat behind my keypads 😄 because I get weary of losing my mind publicly. 😄😄 after making me mad openly severely, one day he came to my inbox and says, " why do you hate me so much?" That statement melted my soul. The only response I said in a sober mood was," I don't hate you".. then it dawned on me that truly, this guys has done nothing wrong to me. I just spark at whatever he says because I don't like him. Hmm... Thank God I didn't block him. 😀
So when I saw him for the first time, I was like... Victoria!!!! Ha.... Even Ajibola F. Amidu droll! 😄 and she had to be on top of my matter that, Sis, you can't lose this man. I don't know why I just like him. 😄 especially his character... His character that I've known for years, but I was looking for Mr fine boi.. his appearance softens two hard babes. 😄)
2: At some point in life, we sure need a companion.
There is this my Uncle, ( His children are on my page and will read this. 😊)
Ever since I grew up to recognize him as my uncle, I've never seen him with a woman. I only heard he lost his precious wife and decided not to marry again, but took care of his children she left behind.
Now, the children are all grown and living their lives. He's all alone. The day I visited him when he was sick, I learned a great lesson of my life... so many things on my mind... and I said, only if he had remarried. He would have had someone taking good care of him.
Then I looked at myself when I would clock 50 and going to 60 as a woman, will I get a good companion then? As a man he can if he wishes to. But as a woman... No Vicky! Make hay while the sun shines girl.
All men are not the same. Don't let any man cast a dark shadow over your life.
You're a good woman. Give love a chance again. Don't be mean. Don't be cold hearted. Open up...
Then I started thinking about Jibola's advise, I started looking back at my now husband and some of his characters if there was ever any traces of abuse or something I can't tolerate in him that has ever hurt me since that 5yrs despite my hostility against him. Then i relaxed for almost 2yrs to know him better before taking him to my family.
Not everyone must get married. Not everyone must have a companion. But get to know yourself and ask yourself some sincere questions. Look at your future and be sincere with yourself.
Do I really need a companion?
Only you can tell yourself the truth. Don't get married because someone did, despite all he or she had been through. Marry because you truly need it.
All the best.
TWO THINGS THAT MADE ME NOT TO GIVE UP ON MARRYING AGAIN.
1: An ex told me I can never see someone like him. That statement made me feel less of myself at some point in my life after I walked away. The challenges were too much. That almost played a role in my life at a point because it was difficult for me to survive without him. So I thought I was actually a bad woman. Not knowing I was feeling that way because I can't afford to buy pant without asking him for the money.
An experience of when your Abuser decided to trap your soul from seeing any other man/woman better than them. They provide you with virtually every you need. So that when you leave, you will find it difficult to survive without them then run back to them.
When the hardship was too much, I cried to God and asked if truly I am that bad that I couldn't get a man to tolerate me.
The answer I got was, "Double your hustle so you don't go hungry to beg all the time"
By the time I doubled my hustle truly, I started seeing responsible helpers. Not knowing I was playing too hard to get as well. My past hurt blinded me from seeing the future. (Even though my husband was part of them, my shakara no gree me see am because I was too busy looking for Mr Handsome not knowing that truly, some people are not just photogenic. So God decided to delay my marriage till the day I met him one on one after 5yrs of toasting and yabbing him. 😄 Oh.. God! I insult this man o... at some point I kept asking myself why I couldn't block him the way I block those irritating me. He wouldn't come to my inbox when he wants to piss me off. He piss me off openly and make me be like a wild cat behind my keypads 😄 because I get weary of losing my mind publicly. 😄😄 after making me mad openly severely, one day he came to my inbox and says, " why do you hate me so much?" That statement melted my soul. The only response I said in a sober mood was," I don't hate you".. then it dawned on me that truly, this guys has done nothing wrong to me. I just spark at whatever he says because I don't like him. Hmm... Thank God I didn't block him. 😀
So when I saw him for the first time, I was like... Victoria!!!! Ha.... Even Ajibola F. Amidu droll! 😄 and she had to be on top of my matter that, Sis, you can't lose this man. I don't know why I just like him. 😄 especially his character... His character that I've known for years, but I was looking for Mr fine boi.. his appearance softens two hard babes. 😄)
2: At some point in life, we sure need a companion.
There is this my Uncle, ( His children are on my page and will read this. 😊)
Ever since I grew up to recognize him as my uncle, I've never seen him with a woman. I only heard he lost his precious wife and decided not to marry again, but took care of his children she left behind.
Now, the children are all grown and living their lives. He's all alone. The day I visited him when he was sick, I learned a great lesson of my life... so many things on my mind... and I said, only if he had remarried. He would have had someone taking good care of him.
Then I looked at myself when I would clock 50 and going to 60 as a woman, will I get a good companion then? As a man he can if he wishes to. But as a woman... No Vicky! Make hay while the sun shines girl.
All men are not the same. Don't let any man cast a dark shadow over your life.
You're a good woman. Give love a chance again. Don't be mean. Don't be cold hearted. Open up...
Then I started thinking about Jibola's advise, I started looking back at my now husband and some of his characters if there was ever any traces of abuse or something I can't tolerate in him that has ever hurt me since that 5yrs despite my hostility against him. Then i relaxed for almost 2yrs to know him better before taking him to my family.
Not everyone must get married. Not everyone must have a companion. But get to know yourself and ask yourself some sincere questions. Look at your future and be sincere with yourself.
Do I really need a companion?
Only you can tell yourself the truth. Don't get married because someone did, despite all he or she had been through. Marry because you truly need it.
All the best.
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